THE END OF FIRST YEAR

akhirnya dah abes pon my first year in cucms!!!
it's been a long journey and i would say that the journey is very tough.macam2 bende aku lalui sepanjang 1st year ak kat cucms ni.dgn exam almost every week lg.tp bagus jugak psl akan sentiasa buat student belajar all the time tp yg tensen xleh nk ponteng kelas sgt la.so kene sentiasa konsisten in the study.
macam2 barang ak beli tyme 1st year ni smpi dh terlebih bajet.terok betol. =.=
dulu memula bajet saving setahun rm3500 tp after membazir bnyk sgt beli barang my saving is only about rm2700.haish terok.tp mmg beli bnyk betol barang tyme 1st year ni.macbook,xperia 8,ipod touch,psp,and lastly blackberry curve.mmg buat habis duit jpa la.haha..
x kire lg ak yg suka enjoy every week.almost every weekend g tgk wayang pastu main pool lg haish terok betol.kira skarang ni duit jpa mmg dh betol2 kosong xde balance langsung dh.hoho...
2nd year nnt dpt duit jpa tros nk saving and i hope i can spend my money more wisely.kira xde nk bazir2 dh.my target item for 2nd year is a tablet and i still dont know which tablet to get but ipad 2 is on top of the list.bg ak guna tablet is a lot more convenient tuk student.senang nk blaja n refer to notes (alasan je sebananye tu).


bercakap psl pengalaman ak sepanjang 1st year kat cucms ni mmg ak rasa this 1st year i had done a lot of mistakes.kira ak boleh di consider as one of problematic student jugak la.especially my role as class rep yg slalu kena target ngan lecturer.everytime ak tgk balik segala masalah yg pernah ak lakukan ak rasa betul2 bersalah sebenarnya.i hope i could improve a lot on my 2nd year.

my academic sometimes make my lecturer worried about me.i actually dont know why bcoz my grades are all ok but i believe there is a lot of improvement can be done.ak igt lg tyme 1st exam kat sini i was the highest in my group but then starting the 2nd sem my result are just so and so and cant even be compared with the very good student.i should be very thankful to Allah bcoz i'm not on the list of the students that need to move out from the college.but even so i still get consulted by my mentor about my grades.for me i've done my best and that is what important.becoming a doctor is about skills not about knowledge i guess so i dont really aim to get good marks but rather enjoy and how to apply the knowledge.

in summary,sebenarnya terlampau bnyk sgt mistakes yg telah aku lakukan tyme ak 1st year ni.i even ashamed actually to see my mentor due to problems i caused.tp kita belajar drpd kesilapan dan aku berharap sgt 2nd year nnt ak dapat jadi lebih baik.harap2 aku dapat lupakan segala masalah yg pernah aku buat tyme aku 1st year dulu.frankly speaking,i think i am the most troublesome student in my batch.haha...that's all for now thank you.

let us changed =)

so many things happen to me last week.and most of them r just bad.
b4 that,nk bgtau cerita kung fu panda 2 ngan xmen:first class mmg terbaek dr ladang.mmg best.espeselli kung fu panda 2 which i think is very deep in emotional background.kudus to both of the movies.



i would say skarang ni ak betul2 rasa sedih ngan ape yg telah terjadi.ak x salahkan org yg open up all my secrets to my mentor but deep inside me ak mmg salahkan die pon.mmg lumrah manusia utk lakukan kesilapan dan aku akui ak dalam perjalanan utk menjadi yg lebih baik.my mentor send me for counselling.he said it is for stress management.aku plak just redha,maybe by talking with professional can make me feel better.but i like my mentor,he just like knew what my problem was.biar aku kata je kat sini my biggest problem or stress is that "I REALLY WANTED TO BE THE PERSON I USED TO BE BEFORE".to be honest,problem ak x besar pon but my mentor said it affecting my study and i stressed when i cant solve my prob.and to be honest i dont think my addiction is a problem bcoz it doesnt affect my well being.but my problem is ak skarang agak kurang solat.aku akui bila kita kurang solat kita akan rasa stress dan rasa hidup macam tiada arah tujuan bila tiada Tuhan dalam kehidupan.itu aku rasa punca kepada problem aku,bukanlah addiction yg budak tu cerita to my mentor.

lg satu stress ak berpunca bila aku xdpt nak penuhi kehendak org.sebenanye aku betol2 rasa bersalah bila seseorang berikan ak satu task dan aku xdpt nk buat task tu.i was elected as class rep of my batch but ak sendiri tau yg aku xkan dpt buat keje punye (bcoz i'm not that type of person who can be trusted with,i know my capability and this is just too big for me).when i'm not really doin my work,ak betol2 rasa bersalah.aku akui ramai org kata ak x bertanggungjawab tp semua itu je la yg mampu ak buat.i can do a minor work but not a very big work.i still learn to do better so i want to apologize especially bcoz my lack of responsibility.every people have stress but it is how they handle it.maybe my way of sometimes ignoring the work given to me actually make me feel very guilty deep down.

thats all for now...

tulih je loh

i wish i could write sumting.skang ak tgh rasa dalam keadaan penyesalan boleh kata.xtau ape yg aku sesalkan tp kenyataannya ak rasa betul2 menyesal.tp ak xtau camne nk describe penyesalan tu psl ak sendiri pon xtau ape ak sesalkan.maybe thats what u get when dh bnyk 'kebetulan' berlaku tp juz ignore 'kebetulan' itu.bukan sekali,2 kali tp dh dekat 5 kali 'kebetulan' ni berlaku.God show me this 'kebetulan' many time so that ak insaf insya Allah.

dah lama x post entry. =.=

its been a long tyme shial since i write in my blog.
tiba2 rasa ade mood nk tulis pasal bila baca balik post2 yg lepas,rasa menarik sgt.baru aku tau ape 'aku yg dulu' fikir.so i'm thinking of writing back my blog bcoz i think it is good n fun.lgpon jelez gak tgk org laen tulis blog.

so azam baru aku i will try to write in my blog weekly and try to share something.especially bcoz diari yg aku ade dh berbulan x berisi and this make my lecturer mad at me sometimes.which cause me to fail my affective domain in biochem.haha...

so at this entry maybe i think i will write about the problem that my batch and uni being encountered with.walopon dah dekat 5 bulan kes ni but i believe it is very important topic to be discussed.

so i think most of people know that the intake my batch had exceed the limit of 150.but my uni cucms had taken in 236 of 2011/12 mbbs intake.terlebih 86 org tu!!!actually idk the best way of telling this problem but i think i will put it in date form so its easy to refer.




31/12/2010:ni la tarikh prof abu bgtau kat batch kitorang psl yg cucms dh exceed intake 150.so he said we need to take out 86 students.this news was really2 depressing esp time tu baru habis block behavioural science.ramai muka nak nanges tp tahan je.aku lak weekend tu ade g camping g pd dgn usrah.mmg mood killer for the weekend.

3/1/2011:this is the 1st parents meeting.meeting yg very annoying and so much lies were given to the parents.aku benci betul kalau dah buat salah xnak ngaku pastu cover2.ak respect prof hatta yg pernah kata,in ur life u will be respected if u tell the truth although the truth hurts u.they tell the parents that they still can work this out and all the students will stay.parents percaya abes dgn apa yg diorg cakap.

2nd week pharmaco:tiba2 klua list name 74 students yg nak dikeluarkan.diberitahu depan kelas oleh my deputy dean of stdnt affair.i really pity her bcoz she's the one that need to do all the hardwork n give bad news bcoz she's not in fault for the problem.but sometimes students xfaham and they blame her.cuak gile tyme dia umum name list tu.at the end of the week also ade meeting ngan parents and it is the 2nd meeting.the meeting also very annoying bcoz the president still give false hope to the parents.i respect prof hatta who stand in front and tell the truth but then some parents kutuk balik kat die.mmg kesian btol prof hatta.at the end,the meeting is so dissappointing bcoz pres cakap bende yg sama cam 1st meeting dulu,diorg akan try the bez to make the students stay but they already 100% know bende tu xboleh dilakukan.


i think till next post i will continue about the issue bcoz it is damn long.haha..tp skarang ni dh solve dh issue ni.bdk2 jpa pergi aucms while bdk2 mara g rcmp.while self sponsored can choose the uni they want n they obtain the compensation.Alhamdulillah...